


Monolouges of a gradeschooler

by WaltzQueen



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Soft Chara (Undertale), chara's a kid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 10:14:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17323079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WaltzQueen/pseuds/WaltzQueen
Summary: A dead child ponders what it means to be alive.





	Monolouges of a gradeschooler

What does it mean to be alive? Chara ponders it as they ride along in the human that has fallen down. Chara wonder if it knows it's stealing their look. Haircut and striped shirt and all. Probably not. Humans were so stupid. That's why they weren't human anymore. The ignorance in them had been burnt away leaving behind something better.  
  
Still, it was awfully rude.  
  
Just like it was rude of that not-a-monster, in the same way chara was not-a-human, to come out swinging. Monsters knew what humans  looked like by now. There was no mistaking them for anything other than a fleshy human. It was rude and Chara would tell Dad if they could wrest control of the meat from the rightful owner. They wouldn't anyway, though.  
  
Steal the body that is. Only bad guys do that. Chara was always a hero. Too bad bring the hero meant fighting the monsters you are trying to protect, sometimes.

 

The first time it happens, Chara watches with frustration as the human sits there, too  stupid and ignorant and human to do anything but get sliced to ribbons. Chara yells at them for standing around doing nothing and then even worse crying about it. But when that doesn't work Chara nudges them, just  a bit, shocking them for a second. The human seems to feel something as the Froggit sends out another magic attack, hopping around the colorful human soul. The human stands there and takes it. Again. Chara wants to tell them to Get out of the way, Dummy, let me do it when their hand shoving at the souls stops the damage.

It's only for a second and all involved parties are confused, but it happens. The Froggit , thoroughly estranged by the change hops off, sparing the meaty person it had been fighting. Chara sticks their tongue out after it as it goes. They shake the magic off of their spectral hand. It takes a couple of tries but they get better at it. They're stuck with this human for now, and no way their team has ever lost anything. The human is just lucky that Chara is with them. But, does it count if you're dead?

Dogaressa throws out another attack. Heart shaped holes on axes  sparkle in the frozen air of Snowdin. The human shakes as the razor edge glances across their soul. The moment to recover is all the human needs. They take the hint and dodge out of the next attack. When the battle ends and all parties are appropriately petted Chara can't help but envy them and their sensations. At least Flowey had that much going for them.

Maybe touch was what it meant to be alive. But as the spectral tingles of electricity raced across them, briefly shielding the human from Mettaton's barrage, their idea dissolved. They weren't alive anymore. If they could feel it, it wasn't a good indicator.  
Maybe it's the ability to change things, Chara contemplates, But they aren't alive and they can change things, sort of. Chara can tell the human little things when they aren't paying attention. They can point out the cozy covers of a bed or the lonely echo of the Waterfall caverns. Chara can even give them a second to breathe, like they used to be able to, to recover their bearings after a blow. But maybe that was a thing for dead people. They certainly hadn't been able to do that when the villagers attacked Asriel-Chara....Chara-Asriel? Asra? Chariel...? Them? But they hadn't been all the way dead, not like now.

Maybe being dead is changing things, Chara thinks as they watch Flowey mimic their mom's face, mimic the human's face on a screen high above them. The souls changed Flowey, the souls were changing the world and each other. And its not like any of Chara's plans worked out when they were alive. But something as simple as pushing a kid's soul had worked out really well when they were dead. Maybe Dad's changing right now? His dust had splattered the flower garden he loved just like their body had hit a dirt floor a long time ago when they were stupid and alive. Flowey is splattering the same way; souls first and then dust. Chara would be dripping magic if they could still drip things, having just saved the human from that gross thing.

The human doesn't acknowledge Chara's greatness, it just gets up and walks out of the Underground. Or at least Chara assumes they do. They're in their own head, thinking. If being dead was change and being alive wasn't. Then it wouldn't exactly be the hero thing to do, but..They'd really like to go back and change everything.

And then they do it again.

 

Chara's confused but then it hits them. The human's Alive! If being dead is about changing things, then the human would keep things the same forever. They stomp their feet and do their best to kick up dust despite not having feet anymore. They could not believe this! All because one stupid jerk  wants to stay alive, everyone's trapped down here.

Chara refuses to protect them for a while. They die and drag Chara back into death with them. It's a blow every time but Chara never lost. And this time the human was not on their side of this argument. Not that humans ever were. They-human and ex-human - manage six different deaths before the human stops and sits down very solemnly. It fiddles with a gross band-aid for a minute, unaware of the silent treatment from someone who can't communicate directly.Then they cry.

The human sobs ugly tears, nothing at all like the pretty human princess in human fairytales. It's an already low bar for a low species in Chara's opinion and it's not even being met. Their scorn would be palpable if they were also palpable but they're not. The human cries harder anyway. Good.

"I'm sorry!" Good, they should be! "I'm sorry, I thought.. you wanted to come back!" Chara pauses. They did say that didn't they? They were still mad, anyway.. Instead of letting it loose steam they switched tracks of anger. Everyone was still trapped down here and no one was getting out! That was the whole point of them dying! Being dead is about changing things!

Eventually the blubbering tapers off with a whispered"Okay" and they're going back through the long rode to New Home. Chara takes it to mean that they're sorry or at least scared enough to not cross them again, which is good. A villain that learns after defeat can be reformed. Then they could do good things, too. The best thing the human could do now was die and the easier that happened, the better. Then Dad would be happy and Mom wouldn't be so mad at him anymore and all the monsters could go free. So, Chara helps them deliver their soul straight to the castle.

Chara does look out more at the underground this time even when they aren't providing their valuable wisdom to this ignorant human. They see some nice monsters and some not so nice monsters. They check out all the neat new puzzle technologies. It's all a reminder of why it's important to die. Dying is for changing things, they had already decided. The sights and sounds just solidified it for the non-solid not-a-person. This is what it is all about.

When the human gets to New Home Mom is there. Chara balks at how mad she still is at Dad. She never called Dad names, not even when he ruined the sofa or knocked down a pie. And then the fish lady is there, Undyne. And everyone's there. Everyone means Alphys and the Skeletons and Mom and Dad and Undyne. Everyone also means Flowey.

When Asriel gives them a hug and says that it's not Chara and they know it they're so upset they'd die if they weren't already dead. But then he says that Chara wasn't a great person and they're mad only the way that a child can be mad. All consuming pettiness and anger tears then up inside. When the human leaves the mountain they gaze at the sun for a moment , letting their grip on themselves loosen and Chara grabs it from that awful Asriel stealer.

 

They aren't proud of what they do next.  
Chara encourages them to be the most human they can be. Knowing what humans are  like,having been one, the human carves a dusty hole into the heart of the underground and just keeps going. At the very end is Asriel who said Chara weren't great even though they died to fix things. Asriel who didn't trust them and took control of their body and let them ruin their only chance of fixing things. Asriel who would rather have this stupid, useless human instead of Chara. Asriel who was pleading for his life. Asriel who had just taken a massive amount of damage. Asriel who was gone. And then the world was gone. Because none of it mattered anymore anyway. All that was left was the ghost of the human Chara who wanted to do the right thing no matter what it cost them and the ghost of Frisk, the human who actually did it and outshined them and beat them at their own game.

At the end of the world Chara feels an ephemeral poke in their side. It's the dumb human Frisk, who was probably less dumb and ignorant and human now that the world was gone. Maybe they were dead. Chara hoped so. Dead humans were the best kind of humans. Still, the maybe-dead-human poked them again.

What?  "I want to go back."  No.  "That was mean. Let's go back. I did it when you asked." Chara  turns away from them. Neither of them have physical forms and directions like 'towards' and 'away' don't exist anymore the the effect is the same. They both sit in the background hum of a dead end universe for a while.

"I'm sorry." About what? "I didn't want to replace you. I'm sorry."  They're crying again. What a weenie. "I'm really, really sorry. I won't do it again." How are you going to do that?  "I don't know, but I'll try." It's more than any other human ever gave Chara but they want insurance.

Give me your soul.

"Deal."

 

He loves them, the re-human, the Frisk. He loves them every time and it makes Chara so, so mad. They tear it all apart again and again. The human can't even complain because they promised and they're still replacing Chara. Chara makes them go back and fix it like they promised but it never works, They've got their fingers locked tight around the seams of the world one day when it dawns on them that it might actually be their fault. If death was for changing things and being alive is all about staying the same, then  weren't they supposed to be different? But here they were, doing the same thing forever. Chara hesitates and tears the world asunder, one last time.

Hey.  "..."  Hey.  "..." Listen to me! ".....what?" I'm giving you a heads up. This is your last chance. I'm not remaking universes anymore. Do it as right as you can. I'll even let you have your soul back if you do it good enough.

Even heroes have to hold things over other people's heads sometimes to get things done. Chara admits they weren't a hero for a while there, but even heroes get to have a villain arc, as long as they come back around. This is their entire world, the collateral is necessary, they think. The void of non-existence is filled with the universe and they are back in it, sleeping on a grave.

Frisk does everything perfectly, like Chara knew they would. The only Nice cream bar they had was for the sake of the flavor and not to heal. Chara's only (self appointed) job at this point was observing. Not that it mattered. They knew what they had to do in the end. So Frisk says they want to stay with their Mom. Good choice in Chara's book. Chara watches them go from the entrance of the cave where they died.

It's like a story ending. The sun going down, all symbolic and junk as the hero walks away and the retired hero fades into the background. Like it's supposed to be. Chara takes the long trip Home. They approximate walking as best as they can, moving down the path. Monsters pass through them occasionally, breif blasts of magic gently dispelling their presence. Chara doesn't mind, they just keep going. At the end of the line is Home and the hole in the ground that let them come Home in the first place.Chara lays down on the ground, where their ashes were scattered like magic stars, where their heart was happiest, and they change.

  
Fourteen days later Chara wakes up. They can feel everything at once and it's overwhelming. The air is so cold. The sunlight pouring in is so bright. Even the little dust motes in the air are alarmingly present. They're scared and they just want their Mom and Dad. They try moving but something's  wrong and they don't know what. They call for help.

Some one comes.  


  
Chara sees Mom every other weekend when she drops the human off with Dad and them. Chara also sees her at school. She's still kind of mad at them, but Chara's trying to not take it personally. Chara didn't like it when Mom took Asriel's side in a fight. Mom probably didn't like it when they took Dad's side, either even though killing the humans really was the best idea.. Chara just hopes she stops being mad soon. They don't have their brother back just like he was but he's with them now. All they need is for Mom and Dad to stop fighting and it'd be fixed up as close to perfectly as possible. They'd be willing to let Mom tear the world up a couple times if it helped but she didn't like the idea. It was probably karma or something, for being evil for a while, that she was still mad. Oh well, some one else would have to die to change this one. Dad would be heart broken all over again if he had to spread their dust again.

Besides, Chara had changed enough. They wanted to stay the same for a while. Just a nice long time growing up with Frisk, playing games with Flowey-Asriel,looking in the mirror waiting with excitement for the day their horns would be visible from beneath their auburn fur. That's what it meant to be alive. They'd have a lot of time to stay the same being a boss monster. They flap their red, red butterfly wings with anticipation..  Changing could wait for later.

**Author's Note:**

> What are little.monsters made of? Magic and dust and gentle trust, that's what monsters are made of.  
> And persitant human souls that have been repeatedly soaked with intense magic.  
> plays with flavor text chara as well as chara as I-frames
> 
> Inspired by the Undertale OST album cover


End file.
